10 Comments

  1. Susan Duggan
    November 19, 2016 @ 2:25 am

    Renee I can identify so much with what you have written, as I too was ‘shut down’ every time I spoke out. This continued throughout my childhood and also into my adult life. Our voices are important!! Continue to be your true authentic self!!!

    Reply

    • rheigel
      November 19, 2016 @ 5:28 am

      Thanks Susan! It’s nice to hear from you. Cheers to sharing 🙂

      Reply

  2. Julie Oldfield
    November 19, 2016 @ 10:55 am

    Dealing with conflict is a tight rope to have to travel. If you lean too far into yourself and shut down your voice, you lose yourself. On the other hand, if you speak out against what others want, then you risk falling again for not being empathetic enough to their needs. This in turn creates guilt. We need to travel very carefully toward are goal, stepping out one foot in front of the other. To focus on the pain we may encounter if we slip will not serve us in reaching our destination. Release your fears and keep your eyes steady on the target. Move slowly and use your senses to balance yourself along the path.

    Reply

    • rheigel
      November 19, 2016 @ 3:53 pm

      Julie, that was so beautifully shared. Thanks for capturing the essence of this fine balance here. So grateful you shared and for this whole community,right now. I like how you said “move slowly and use your senses”…yes!

      Reply

  3. Laura Stern
    November 20, 2016 @ 4:00 pm

    Wow Renee! That blog certainly resonates with me. My heart aches for myself and so many women in my life who have lost their voice, stomped down their true feelings and hearts desires so as to “fit in” or avoid conflict! On some level, I think most of the women I know have lived life as “the good girl” and it is incredibly painful, emotionally and physically, to hold our emotions in check because of fear. Such a personally destructive act as those emotions held in find other ways to surface through repressed anger, overeating, etc. as you well know. Your phone call with your friend makes me want to reach out to a “wise woman” in my life who has helped me find my voice. You are one of the “wise women” that I know and love. Be fierce-be brave–you are so wonderfully wise and I love hearing from you. Hugs Renee!! Peace to you.

    Reply

    • rheigel
      November 21, 2016 @ 6:17 pm

      Thank you Laura! Hugs to you and so much love is being sent your way right now. I recently listened to a podcast with Elizabeth Gilbert talking about leaving the “good girl” behind and becoming the “free” woman instead. That impacted me, it’s a powerful idea. Talk soon 🙂

      Reply

  4. Sherry Yagiela
    November 21, 2016 @ 5:53 pm

    Thank you for being so real and vulnerable. I love what you said about people will receive the message when they are ready to do so. It is so true. Vulnerability is something I have always had a problem with due to childhood events. I didn’t want to be vulnerable, I needed to keep my cement wall up in case anyone rejected or hurt me. It took a long time even in my marriage to be truly vulnerable. And even a year ago I was accused by my hubby (and rightfully so) that I didn’t go too deep into conversations. Fighting doesn’t count but that was sometimes the only way I would get out my true feelings and emotions. I have grown wiser of course and realize being vulnerable is a gift – to myself and to others. I have also learned to just BE in what I am feeling. It is so much harder than it sounds but it is critical to my emotional growth. Thank you Renee for helping me get there!

    Reply

    • rheigel
      November 21, 2016 @ 6:24 pm

      Sherry, my eyes just filled with tears reading this from you. You must be so proud of the person that you are. I am so glad you are here and love hearing from you. Reading your words also reminded me of part of the Marianne Williamson quote, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.”

      Reply

  5. Stephanie Lord-Johnson
    November 21, 2016 @ 10:18 pm

    Great post – I can relate to it all! I love the idea that we need to push our envelope and receive some negative comments – must be the pleaser in me! It has taken me a little while to find how I want to move forward – and yes using my voice in a strong loving manner is key! Love finding more areas where I can grow and expand when the initial desire is to blame the outside workd. Thanks for sharing your journey – not just your nutrition!

    Reply

    • rheigel
      November 23, 2016 @ 4:13 pm

      Thanks Stephanie and I’m glad you could relate. I will keep sharing more than just my nutrition! I appreciate that 🙂

      Reply

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